Stony prompt, all throughout SHIELD Steve is known as a horrible computer person, think like single finger typing, clicking all the links you shouldn’t, doing scams etc. Tony’s super confused though cause some of his dad’s and Peggy’s stories talk about how good he was at the early computer Howard made. So Tony trusts his gut and gives Steve a top of the line computer, and when Steve brings it back with virus, Tony says you got it on there, you can get it off, Steve grins

kayytx:

HAH.

The thing is, Steve didn’t set out to be such a troll when he first woke up. He had 70 years’ worth of history and scientific and technological advancements to catch up on so he wasn’t about to waste any more time than he had to.

So when Maria Hill puts a laptop down in front of Steve and tells him to take it to the IT department to get it set up, he’s so excited about getting his hands on new tech he almost trips on the way to the computer labs.

Except he gets to SHIELD IT and it’s run by a bunch of assholes. They treat him like he’s an idiot, deliberately speaking slowly and dragging certain words out as if they’re speaking a foreign language that Steve wouldn’t understand. They patronize him and set up the laptop so that it’s “idiot-proof”, easy enough to work on that even a 90 year old could use its basic functions. They basically turn what would have been a beautifully functioning computer into a brick that barely does anything. Steve’s seething by the time he leaves the room.

Because he’s secretly petty af, he decides then and there to make life very difficult for the IT Pricks. He pretends to be as dumb as they think he is and goes back every other day with a new “issue” on his phone or computer. When they fix his stuff he insists that they should just give him instructions on how to do things instead of directly fixing it themselves. So he spends hours in the computer labs single finger typing the code that the IT Pricks tells him to, clicks links he knows are wrong, and turns off the computer “by accident” whenever it looks like they’re close to solving the issue. The IT Pricks hate him just as much as he hates them, and they tell everyone how terrible Captain America is at new technology.

Tony’s super confused though because he’s heard the stories from Howard and Peggy. He’s read the history books. Everyone who knows Cap talks about how quickly he was able to figure out how a HYDRA weapon works. Dude was never trained on how to fly a plane but he did just that when he saved the world (yeah he plunged into the water, but he did that deliberately). So Tony knows Steve can’t possibly be as dumb as everyone says he is unless being frozen for close to a century killed all his brain cells.

He gives Steve the latest of SI’s line of products which includes a laptop, tablet, and phone, and tells him to just let JARVIS or himself know if he ever runs into any issues with the tech. Steve, who’s used to dealing with the IT Pricks, initially thinks that Tony, as the face of technology, would be just as terrible as those assholes if not worse. So the first thing he does when he gets to his room and boots up his laptop is slow it down by downloading three of the most useless anti-virus softwares he knows, a torrent program, and a knockoff version of Microsoft Office. Then he opens a few porn sites on Internet Explorer and lets the pop up ads just fill up the entire screen of the computer.

Then he takes the laptop to Tony and asks him to fix it. “I don’t know what happened,” he says. “I was just on the Google searching for food in the area and all of this popped up.”

Tony squints at him a little bit. He literally gave the laptop to Steve thirty minutes ago. No true tech-stupid person could get all of that to happen that quickly. So he looks at Steve dead in his eyes and tells him, “Listen, Steve. You’re a smart guy and I’m not an idiot. I don’t know what you’re trying to do, but you got that crap on your computer. You can get it off yourself. Come to me when there’s a real problem.”

Steve’s shocked. He’s never been treated this way by anyone before. Every person always just looked at him like he was an idiot. They scoffed whenever he spoke and rolled their eyes when they thought he wasn’t looking. They always thought he was an idiot and he was happy to play along just to wind them up.

But Tony? He didn’t believe any of it for a second. He straight up told Steve that he knows he’s smart and doesn’t treat him like he’s a child or a senile old man.

Steve grins and plops himself down right next to Tony on the workshop couch, and proceeds to fix the computer himself. Then he logs on to Yelp to check out new restaurants while he quietly figures out how to ask Tony on a date.